I pay very close attention to who I feel the closest to in my life and why I feel close to them. I have discovered the friends I feel the closest to are the ones that I share equal time with. Let me explain.
One of my best friends is Cari. There are many reasons why she is a wonderful friend but one of the many is she is a great listener.
So what we do when get together is we have an informal "agenda." And if you were to print this agenda out it would read:
· Work
· Husbands
· Children
· Extended family
· Yourself
When we start out on our walk with a green tea in our hand (our favorite thing to do), we go down the list.
First Cari talks about her husband and then I talk about mine.
Then we talk about work and how blessed we are and what we need to improve on. She goes, and then I go.
Children. We have exactly the same age girl and boy so we have lots of comparisons and share parenting tips.
Extended family. We know each other's families well and update on how everyone is doing.
Yourself. We talk about what we are doing to be happy, rested and nourished so we can be the best we can be for all the people who need us.
Then when we are done our walk we have had equal air time (because we both love to talk) and we have covered our entire lives! No one feels like the other one took over the conversation -and don't we all have friends like that? ( If you are the kind of person who finds it hard to think of what to say, try making a list of categories to talk about.)
Grab your best friend, grab a tea and go for a walk - oh and bring your agenda.